Neurodivergence and Mental Illness
This is a tough post for me to write because I've always struggled with being super critical of myself and dealing with issues related to my mental health. It's been a long, hard journey with lots of ups and downs that have really left their mark on me. I went through years of being misdiagnosed, which just made things more frustrating, like I was stuck in a fog, trying to find some clarity but only getting more confused. Spending time in mental
health wards took a toll on me, both physically and emotionally. Each stay was a mixed bag; I got some care and support, but the environment was often overwhelming and made me feel even more isolated and hopeless. My imagination, which could have been a great source of creativity, often turned against me, fueling anxiety and intrusive thoughts that made everything feel worse. Sometimes the diagnosis was right, but the reasons behind it were missed; my ACC played a big role in my mental health struggles, but this important part was often overlooked in the rush to label and treat my symptoms.
In my twenties, I felt completely lost, caught in a whirlwind of confusion and emotional chaos. I was pretty immature, both socially and emotionally, and didn't have the tools or understanding to handle adult life. My relationships were often strained because I struggled to connect with others in a meaningful way. I found myself swinging between intense highs and crushing lows, without much idea of how to stabilize my emotions or build a support system. This time in my life was full of reckless decisions and impulsive behavior, driven by a desperate need to escape the pain I was feeling inside. I often fell into self-destructive habits, looking for temporary relief but ending up feeling more isolated and despairing. Not being mature enough to handle my emotions and the social stuff around me made it really hard to form lasting connections or ask for help when I needed it most. Looking back, I can see how these experiences shaped my journey and added to my ongoing battle with mental health, but at the time, I felt stuck in a cycle that seemed impossible to break.
I was misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder, schizoaffective disorder, depression, anxiety
disorder, and more. But when I found out about Agenesis of the Corpus Callosum, the head of psychiatry took back everything except for persistent depression and anxiety disorder. Eventually, I was diagnosed with ADHD and ASD, and finally CPTSD...and it all finally made sense to me.
Through it all I've spent years in self-reflection and self-inquiry and when everything shook out I came up on top. I still struggle, but I have the tools to work with.
Taking care of my mental health is super important to me now. When anxiety starts to take over, I use the 3-3-3 method:
3 things you see: Look around and name three things you can see. Check out their colors, shapes, or textures.
3 things you hear: Pay attention to your surroundings and pick out three different sounds. It might be traffic, the hum of a fan, or someone talking in the distance.
3 body movements: Move three parts of your body. You could wiggle your toes, roll your shoulders, or tap your fingers.
I've found DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) super helpful. It's something you can learn in therapy or even study on your own. The main idea is to really focus on the present without judging your thoughts. DBT teaches you some key skills: handling distress, being effective with people, and managing your emotions...
Dealing with Tough Times:
It's about handling rough emotional patches without adding to the mess.
Getting Along with Others:
This is about talking clearly, setting limits, and keeping your self-respect intact.
and
Managing Emotions:
This means figuring out, identifying, and tweaking those intense or overwhelming feelings.
I highly recommend The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook if you want to tackle it on your own, but by all means if you are in counseling of any type reach out to your therapist and let them know you are interested in DBT.
Comments